If the person you are caring for becomes more unwell as their illness develops, they may feel more comfortable being looked after in hospital or in a hospice. It is often difficult to accept that this is the best solution, especially if you have put all your time and energy in recent weeks into caring for someone at home. You may both feel very disheartened and anxious that they might not be able to come home again. However, it is quite usual for someone to go into hospital or a hospice for a short time so that their symptoms can be closely monitored and brought under control, and then to return home.

If the GP, district nurse, home care team or social worker suggests a short stay in hospital or a hospice, it might be useful to take some time to discuss this option. The specialist care and advice that can be provided often relieves pain and other problems.

Hospices specialise in the control of pain and other symptoms. They are smaller and quieter than hospitals and they often work at a much gentler pace. Many have kitchens, sitting rooms and accommodation for relatives, and maybe even a bar. Accommodation and care in a hospice is always free of charge. Some are set up as part of the health service and others are funded by charities. Sometimes there is a waiting list, but this is usually short. Many hospices also have home care teams and day centres for people living at home.

If you are not sure about the idea of hospital or hospice care, you can ask to visit before making a decision. You can then talk to the staff about your concerns.