There will be times when you need more than a few hours off, or an evening's break. Recognising when this is needed can be very important. If you need a break, the GP, district nurse, home care team or social worker may be able to arrange for the person you are caring for to go into a hospice, hospital, residential home or private nursing home for a short while. This is called respite care.

Obviously this is a decision you will have to make jointly with the person you are caring for. They may even be the one to suggest it if you are getting very tired. Both of you might enjoy the change of scene and company. After a few days' break, you may both feel rested and better able to manage at home again.

Before you make a decision, you, the person you are caring for, and perhaps other members of the family, might find it reassuring to go and see the hospital, home or hospice and talk to the staff.

In another type of respite care, a carer will come to the person's home to enable you to get away for a while. This may be suitable if the person with cancer does not want to leave their home or is unable to do so.

An organisation called Crossroads has a national network of home respite carers working through local authorities. Their services are mostly provided free of charge.