A diagnosis of cancer is a devastating experience for most people. When they are first told that they have cancer many people feel shocked, numb, and unable to believe what is happening or to feel any emotion. Some people feel as though the situation is happening to someone else, as though they are watching themselves from the outside.
At first you may find that all you can take in is the fact that you have cancer. Often people say that once they have been told they have cancer they did not hear the rest of the conversation at all. One person who had just been diagnosed said 'the doctor's lips were moving, but I couldn't hear any sound coming out'.
You may also feel panicky and may have some of the physical symptoms described in the section on panic. You might find that you can take in only a small amount of information and so you have to keep asking the same questions over and over again. You may need to be told the same bits of information repeatedly. This is a common reaction to shock. Some people might find their feelings of disbelief make it difficult for them to talk about their illness with their family and friends. Other people might feel an overwhelming urge to discuss it with everyone.
The diagnosis and treatment may make you feel a range of strong emotions such as fear, anger, sadness or depression. These emotions can be very frightening and difficult to deal with. Over time they generally get easier to cope with, but time to be sad and to reflect is necessary before you can adjust to your situation and begin to cope with life again.
Even when you have finished your treatment you may find it difficult to return to your old life. Our section on adjusting to life after cancer treatment discusses the feelings and emotions that you may have once the treatment has ended.
Some people find that the emotions and feelings do not get easier to deal with, and you may need help in learning to cope with them. There are many ways of managing the emotions and feelings that cancer can cause and later in this section are suggestions on things that you can do for yourself, as well as sources of help and support.
If you have some of the emotions mentioned in this section you may find it hard to concentrate. We hope, though, that even if you only read a few pages, you will find something of interest. If you are very worried about your cancer or are depressed, please remember it can be well worth taking the steps to find help. Talking things through with a friend or a professionally trained person, learning to relax, or having a complementary therapy can help you to feel very much better, even if it can't change your situation.